i think i've finally come to the realization that i'm an adult now and that i can't go back. there are those that attempt this feat, and i can say from my own observations that it does not bode well for them. i have to make the best of what i've been handed. sort of a "if life gives you lemons, make lemonades" type philosophy. i work at wal-mart. i don't have a degree. i can't afford to have a degree. i'm going to be moving in with my parents again in a couple of weeks and i'm probably going to have to stay there until a.)they come into some money and can afford to make the house payments on their own or b.)i get married. it's not what i want, but it's what i've got. so all i can do is work my ass off, try to get along with my parents and work out a way to go back to school. i can't just lay down and end up being a 30 year old assistant manager at wal-mart who still lives with his parents. screw that. we have one of those at our store and he is a sad, sad man.

i was thinking about all this last week when my roommates and friends were talking about graduating and moving away to their post-grad jobs or plans. i'll be basically alone here. it forced me to realize the aforementioned truths that i'm facing. this is not to say that i can't still listen to rock and roll and have a faux-hawk ( i have one of those by the way). it means that i have to quit searching for my magic time machine and just deal with now. be a man and all that jazz.

and i need a girl so i can get married and exempt myself from having to live with my parents.

kidding.

anywho - new music tips: the new underoath song "reinventing your exit" on purevolume.com is freaking amazing. and if anybody tells you that the band moneen is good, they're full of shit. don't be fooled by the one good song on vagrant.com. it's the only one. and the new coheed and cambria is definitely worth your money. excellent album. and that's about it.

anyway, this is what's been on my mind since the last time i wrote in here. so uh, hi everyone.